Dare to Soar
| “Some matters are so sensitive and intensely personal and can waken such disturbing feelings that they are seldom mentioned publicly. Yet if tenderly and compassionately treated in a light of truth, discussion of these matters can bring greater understanding with the easing of pain and a blessing of healing and even the avoidance of further tragedy.” Richard G. Scott |
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My Approach
Therapy enables an individual to access inner resources and take mental and/or physical action to create desired change through a safe, supportive relationship that acts as a mirror and sounding board, revealing “new” information to the individual.
Therapy should result in healing, understanding, growth, self-awareness and self-acceptance (HUGS). It should be fueled by the emotionally fueled goals of connection, purpose, and responsibility (CPR). Finally, the whole person needs to be considered when looking for happiness and health including the following aspects: physical, social, environment, mental/intellectual, spiritual, emotional, and financial.
I integrate the following methods:
Existential Thinking
“The individual who is always adjusted is one who does not develop himself...” - Dabrowski, Kawczak, & Piechowski, 1970
Therapy makes use of positive anxiety and assists a person in finding meaning and purpose in life. Anxiety and unease is a good thing. Anytime we grow or change we are temporarily destabilized. In order to grow, old ways of being must be deconstructed and new ways built. Dabrowski speaks in depth about the process of positive disintegration and the development of the personality based on innate sensitivities which make one more prone to this destabilizing/restabilizing process.
Attachment Theory
"Adults thrive if another person is committed to caring for them, children benefit when they have two parents legally and emotionally dedicated to them, societies benefit if individuals sort themselves into families." - K. S. Berger, 2008
We are wired for connection. Without a sense of connection we cannot thrive. The quality of our relationships deeply influences our happiness in life. One theory that aids in deepening, healing, and strengthening relationships is Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy. Systems theory also falls under this heading for me as it is focused on relationships and parallels between ourselves and the larger groups we are a part of. It is impossible to impact one relationship without impacting another. All our actions ripple out, touching others in our lives and larger systems. It is wise to engage all possible systems in aiding us in our quest to live a joyful life.
Positive Psychology
“Man’s mind, once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimensions.” - Holms
One purpose of our existence is to learn and grow and experience joy. Play is important. Therapy should not only work towards healing but towards excelling. Sometimes it is better to build on strengths instead of focusing on weaknesses. For this purpose, I utilize techniques from Life Coaching, Solution Focused Therapy and Reality Therapy to assist clients in finding out what they want and how they can obtain happiness now.
Psychodynamic Principles
"If one is estranged from oneself, then one is estranged from others too. If one is out of touch with oneself, then one cannot touch others." - Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Early experiences often have an unconscious affect on us today. Bringing these things to light gives us greater control over our reactions and understanding of ourselves. We have many defenses that aid in keeping us safe, but sometimes what used to work now gets in our way. Becoming aware of this gives us a choice in our behaviors.
Biopsychosocial Outlook
"Change, no matter how much for the better, still feels cold and lonely at first...because it doesn't feel like home. Old patterns, no matter how negative and painful...have an incredible magnetic power - because they do feel like home." - Gloria Steinem
For some, there is a physical component to mental health issues. This is a new and exciting field that offers hope where other methods fail. Sometimes we must first address the physical before we can move on to other healing. The brain is an amazing and complicated instrument that we do not yet completely understand. Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy is a great aid in this area, having many good methods that assist us in changing our thoughts and behaviors in concrete ways once we are aware of what no longer works for us and have healed the underlying wounds or physical limitations that brought about those thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors.
Person Centered Practices
"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Underpinning all my work is the belief in the goodness of mankind and the conviction that any relationship, especially the therapy relationship, must be built on respect and honesty. All people strive to be their ideal, best self. Bringing who they are now closer to who they long to be is part and parcel of therapy. Therapy is a live encounter in the present and experiencing new and different things can be safely attempted in this setting. Gestalt methods can sometimes intensify and cement these experiences in a way that will change the neural pathways in our brains in the same way that these other methods do.